Why (m)other? An exploration of choice etiology for nonbiological lesbian moms

This dissertation explored the phenomenological identity of mother from the perspective of the lesbian coparent using female developmental and social construction theory from a feminist viewpoint as its theoretical base. Previous research on lesbian family life has indicated that lesbian households are extremely varied in structure although overall there appears to be an egalitarian base to their structures that have produced psychologically healthy and well-adjusted children. An important gap in the current literature regards the etiology of and the criteria used by the nonbiological mom in her decision to parent given her invisible status in society from a legal and social perspective. Eight women aged 25 to 60 who self-identified as lesbian coparents were interviewed to elucidate (a) the meaning of mother given the lack of societal support for their family structure, and (b) the criteria they utilized in coming to the decision to mother. Gilligan's justice/care paradigm was used to identify the underlying factors of the participants' decision-making processes using a reading guide adapted from her group's research. Results revealed that all the women used the caring perspective to confront the lack of justice in our patriarchal society. This created a passive resistance to their oppression by society. These results make an important contribution to the existing literature and can enhance social change initiatives through the creation of an egalitarian family structure that challenges the current patriarchal model of society and serves as a role model for future family systems including those of the heterosexual majority and has the potential to equalize the power system in the entire society instead of it resting in the hands of a few in a hierarchal fashion.