In God we lust: Implications of religious messages on sexual communication and perceptions of sexual satisfaction in romantic relationships

The purpose of this study was to investigate the implications of religious messages and gender roles on sexual communication, and perceptions of sexual satisfaction between committed romantic partners. The data aggregated from this study sought to reveal the specific religious messages to which romantic partners are exposed, their interpretations of those messages, and how those messages affect their sexual discourse and their perceptions of sexual satisfaction. Correspondingly, this study also gathered data pertaining to how partners' perceptions of parents' demonstration of gender roles, religiously prescribed gender roles, and their own enactment of gender roles influence sexual communication, sexual satisfaction, and overall relationship satisfaction. In addition, the current study examined the specific sexual topics openly discussed or purposefully avoided between romantic partners and their subsequent implications on perceptions of sexual satisfaction.;Through in-depth interviews, results indicated that partners exposed to the following religious messages: wait until marriage to have sex; sex is a sin; women are submissive; sex is a sacred act; true love waits; monogamy; waiting until marriages has relational benefits; no divorce; and homosexuality is wrong. Being told to wait until marriage was the most frequently occurring theme that emerged from the interviews. Participants' responses to religious messages surfaced in two major categories: justifications and reactions. Participants either justified their behaviors and/or attitudes by means of personal decision, perceived lack of control over sexual behaviors, and social comparison, or they reacted by expressing feelings of guilt, scare tactics, and the notion that sex is a taboo subject. The current study also revealed that exposure to certain religious messages led to topic avoidance, boundary setting, reinforcement of shared beliefs, and conflict in sexual communication. More than half of all participants reported that they did not perceive religious messages to have any effect on their level of sexual satisfaction, but that their overall relationship satisfaction was enhanced by their religious faith.;Traditional masculine and feminine themes were reported by participants when asked about their parents' enactment of gender roles. Notably, nearly half of all participants reported that they did not engage in conversations regarding sexual matters with their parents. Participants' perceptions of their parents' gender roles affected their sexual communication in the following ways: they mirrored their parents' gender roles, executed relatively equal gender roles, and several participants reported that males always initiate sexual conversations. In reference to their own enactment of roles, romantic partners reported that males generally initiated sexual conversations; roles constantly were being negotiated within the relationship; there was an equal responsibility to initiate sexual conversations; and finally, women were viewed as passive in the relationship. Regarding the effects of religiously prescribed gender roles on sexual communication, the man was seen as the leader; women were viewed as submissive; and men were expected to make the decisions in the relationship.;Finally, participants reported discussing sexual likes/dislikes and "everything" most frequently in their romantic relationships, while sexual history was the most frequently avoided topic. The vast majority of participants reported that they believed their sexual satisfaction would increase if they discussed all relevant and preferred sexual topics during sexual conversations.