Study On The Relationship Between Mother-in-law And Daughter-in-law In The Temporary Stem Family

Under the background of social change,with the change of family life cycle nurturing function varies,there is a new family mode,namely temporary stem family.When the temporary stem family formed,the corresponding relationship between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law will also be different from the relationship between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law under conventional family structure.Based on a large amount of reading literature,this study uses semi-structured interviews of cases as main method and participates in observations as a supplementary method for15 pairs of mother-and-daughter-in-law relationship,7 separate mother-in-law cases,2separate daughter-in-law cases,and 5 husbands(sons)cases among four different communities(A,B,C,and D)in Haikou.A total of 44 cases were interviewed and observed.On this basis,the main features of a stem family are summarized,including the spatial and attributional temporality.On the basis of previous research,the author interviewed 44 cases of temporary stem families in four communities(A,B,C,and D)in Haikou,according to the characteristics of the temporary stem families.And then by collating and summarizing the interview data,it is found that there are mainly four types of relationship between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in a stem family: pay-return,pay-dislike,exclusion-tolerance,and harmony-coexistence.Through the study of these four types of in-law relationships,the representative characteristics of each type are summed up.Pay-return mode rely on the energy and physical strength that the mother-in-law gives in the temporary stem family,while the daughter-in-law with much less responsibilities.However,both parties can coexist harmoniously under one roof.The main characteristic of the pay-dislike mode is that party A tries as much as possible to make the other partyhappy for maintaining stability in the family,but the other party express many dissatisfactions on the contrary.Exclusion-tolerance mode emphasizes that the mother-in-law expresses dissatisfaction with her daughter-in-law from various aspects of her words or actions,and even though the daughter-in-law has many dissatisfactions in her heart,she chooses to tolerate without any saying for the interests of the family,or she chooses to do so because of the temporary living circumstances.The characteristic of harmony-coexistence mode is that both parties can handle family affairs,from daily life,peacefully and supportively under the same roof.From inner heart,they appreciate each other.Eventually,harmonious coexistence be reached for both parties.Hereby,this article uses the role theory to explore and analyze the role played by the mother-in-law as well as the daughter-in-law in the four modes of relationship.After completing the analysis of different modes of relationship between mot her-in-law and daughter-in-law,the author further analyzes the causes of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in temporary stem family.Through analysis,it is concluded that the temporary nature of space-time and attribution is the key reason for the relationship between "repulsion and patience" and intergenerational imbalance is the main cause of "pay-return" and "harmony-coexi stence";The dominance in the temporary backbone family is an important reason for the "pay-averse" type of relationship between mother-in-law and mother-in-law.On this basis,the analysis of how these four types of relationship between mother-in-law and mother-in-law affected temporary family members,and what kind of impacts they produced,such as the splitting effect of "pay-averse" type,the maintenance of "repulsive-bearing" type,and "pay-The "return" type consolidates and the "harmony-coexistence" type shifts.At the end of the article,the author proposes three countermeasures to promote the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law: guiding the two parties to establish a correct role orientation,building mutual understanding and cooperation;actively playing the intermediary role of the husband(son)and coordinate the relationship between the mother and the wife towards a harmonious direction;minimizing the scale of a family to avoid conflicts between both parties.